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I can’t think of a title for this post, so rather than stare at it for ages I’m just going to start typing.

It’s been such a long time since I posted anything. I’ve been on a mental and emotional roller coaster…. no maybe caught in a mental and emotional cyclone is a better way to describe it. Not just ups and downs but getting turned around and pushed around. Completely knocked off course.

And it does feel a bit like “a perfect storm” – midlife, perimenopausal, various health issues and way too many doctor appoinments for my liking; late diagnosed AuDHD and the processing, reprocessing, and mixed feelings of grief and relief that comes with that; kids becoming less dependent, but still very dependent, and parents getting to that stage in life where they welcome a bit of assistance from their kids.

Whatever way I think of it, it’s a very long and tiring stage of my life. And I still feel quite far away from where I want to be.

There has been a lot of disregulation, agoraphopia, overwhelm, uncertainty; but also some days (or half days) of feeling quite clear headed and like I can see my way forward. And progress has been made. I have managed a few walks, I reduced my work hours down to what will hopefully be a manageable level for me and my current capacity; and I’ve started to crochet again. I even bought a few plants and got outside in the garden – even if it was only a few mins.